Why do things happen which appear not good?

Having had my share of challenges recently, which, based on different perspectives can be good or not, I thought I would write some random ramblings.

If you don't know this about me, this is a key to who I am: I believe in G-d (aka Hashem) and I believe that He runs this world in all its minutia. You can agree or disagree, its up to you, but this helps keep me SANE (assuming I am, that is!)

So I do believe that even when things appear not to be great on one level, there is always a bigger reason for it - to quote one of my favorite children (I have 7 favorite birth kids -- the rest are working on it!] "There is a reason why Hashem wants us to be in this place at this time NOW".

Truth be told, we don't always know the reasons for everything, but ultimately, it is good. Hashem is good, this world is good, and He created me, and put me where I am now, so it must be good.

This lesson was an amazing life changing realization for me when my mother and my best friend passed away within 6 months of each and my life appeared to be collapsing around me.  I realized then that I have no control over the "Universe" or other people, and whereas I used to be a very angry person, I no longer have ANGER. i have frustrations, but not real ANGER. Anger is a control issue. Maybe I'll write more about that later.

Sometimes we do our best and Hashem has other plans for us. That means, while our best WAS good enough, it just wasn't the right time for it.

Often there are people who make statements, do things, have behaviors that are questionable, and they make decisions or do things which seem really bad to the rest of us.  It doesn't mean it ISN'T bad, it means that they are the CONDUIT for the ultimate outcome, and they themselves have their own lessons to learn from their behavior. We can't control their behavior, or their lessons, but we can control our reactions to what happens to us and how we conduct ourselves in life.

Injustices are seen and experienced, and life altering decisions are made, and each one of us has a lesson we have to learn from it.  Sometimes the lesson is painful -- treat people kindly and considerately and you won't get hurt yourself -- and sometimes the lesson is eye opening - OH, I REALLY AM NOT RUNNING THIS WORLD, what a relief!!!

But ultimately, we are responsible for OUR reactions and OUR lessons.

The biggest lesson I have learned in my life in recent months is gratitude: Gratitude, mainly, that I don't run the world.  Gratitude that my husband has a wonderful job. Gratitude that my husband allows me to be home and do my thing. Gratitude that I am able to see the good that comes out of the doo doo. and many many many more reasons.

Doesn't excuse bad behavior, that's THEIR lesson to learn. But at least I can face it with a great attitude!

Baruch Hashem.